I don’t know if this is a real term, or if I’m just making it up to suit what I aim to say, but I see the story of Persephone accurate for how I see Pain and Growth. Without the Winter, there wouldn’t be Spring and Summer. Sorrow is necessary for Happiness. Dying and wilting plants make us appreciate the fresh beauty of yearly green growth returning. The extreme lack I feel in winter I call pain, and the joy I feel once Spring arrives I call growth. This is the Persephone Effect. There is no Spring until Winter is over.
I’ve seen again and again that the majority of my growth comes because of pain. Yes we can grow through little experiences and slightly inconsequential events, but when facing pain, feeling real pain, and having no choice but to deal with a painful ‘thing’, we can either drown in pain or build a boat of growth.
I find drowning so very uncomfortable, I always try to build myself a boat. Not that building a boat is the easy option, but I don’t see drowning easy either.
The knowledge that pain brings you growth helps just a bit… It isn’t much of a light at the end of the tunnel, but if you consciously say to the pain… “I’m now going to build myself a big fucking boat”; you acknowledge no drowning is going to happen. How you build that boat, you may not yet know. Have hope you will figure it out. One day at a time, one week at a time, one month at a time, and don’t be discouraged by it taking a year, because a year of building a big fucking boat means you end up with a bloody awesome ship. Or as the Persephone Effect promises: an incredibly beautiful Spring.